Literally Figuratively

February 2, 2015

“No one is yet using figuratively to mean literally; the confusion, such as it is, is all in one direction.”
~ Ammon Shea

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I am literally writing these words on Groundhog Day.  Whether Punxsutawney Phil actually saw his shadow this morning or not, there are literally six weeks and four days from today until the first day of Spring.

Recently, I have noticed the word “literally” being (figuratively) peppered throughout people’s conversations and, on most occasions, being used to say something obviously non-literal.

The word “literal” comes from the Latin littera, meaning letter, and is defined in the Oxford Dictionary as: Taking words in their most basic sense, without metaphor or allegory; free from exaggeration or distortion.

And yet, modern colloquial conversation is filled with figurative or metaphorical uses of the word.

The antonym (opposite) for literally is “figuratively”, meaning to do or say something symbolically or metaphorically.  In other words, not literally.

In the exact opposite of its original definition, the word “literally” is now being used figuratively for emphasis, as in: “That heavy metal band literally rocked our socks off” or “His improper use of the word made me literally tear my hair out in frustration.”

The use of “literally” is not literal in the above examples because even the best rock concerts don’t cause our socks to spontaneously leap off of our feet and, although I do get frustrated at the current misuse of literally, I’m much too vain to suffer the pain and permanent bad hair day that pulling my own hair out in frustration would cause.

I apologize if it seems that I am figuratively appointing myself a member of the metaphorical Word Police; that is not my intention.  The English language is a living, ever-changing form of communication, and part of what makes it vibrant is its colloquialisms, its common and informal usage.  As a native Californian, I must admit to using the word “totally” in a non-literal sense on (literally) more occasions than I can count.

I guess it just seems to me that lately, no matter how it is being used, the word literally has become this year’s “awesome” and is now the go-to emphatic for those without a thesaurus.

If you want to add emphasis when telling a story, the English language is full of colorful choices.  Here are some:

Virtually
Practically
Figuratively
Metaphorically

Like the word literally, the following words would most certainly be used in a less than literal sense.  However, just for variety’s sake, here are some alternatives:

Absolutely
Indubitably
Positively
Definitely
Incontrovertibly
Unequivocally
Altogether
Utterly
Completely
Totally

I sincerely thank you all for indulging me.  I am overwhelmingly grateful for the opportunity to express both my philosophical and mundane musings via this blog and I wish each and every one of you a positively beautiful week!

~~~~~~~~~

Did you literally not get enough pizza on Super Bowl Sunday?  If not, Bean and Bacon Pizza will figuratively hit the spot.

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Bean and Bacon Pizza
This delicious and hearty pizza is easy to put together using prepared pizza crust.  Vegetarians can omit the bacon and substitute some of the mozzarella with smoked mozzarella or smoked cheddar.  Tip: rinsing the canned beans in a mesh strainer before cooking helps reduce some of the “gassy” side effects.

2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil (plus more to brush crust)
1 clove fresh garlic
1/2 teaspoon balsamic vinegar
3 or more tablespoons water
1 (15oz) can cannellini beans, rinsed and drained
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
A dash of paprika
Salt and black pepper, to taste
1 (10 to 12-inch) ready to top packaged pizza crust
1 & 1/2 to 2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
1 & 1/2 tablespoons chopped fresh chives
1/4 cup crumbled, crispy-cooked bacon
2 tablespoons finely-grated Parmesan cheese

Cook beans:
Make cuts partly through garlic clove to release flavor, but leave whole.  Heat oil in a small saucepan over medium heat.  Add garlic and cook, stirring constantly, until translucent.  Add vinegar and 3 tablespoons water and stir a minute or so more.  Remove garlic clove and discard.  Add beans, thyme and paprika.  Season with salt and pepper to taste.  Stir to combine.  Add a tablespoon or two more of water, if necessary.  When the beans begin to bubble, reduce heat to a low simmer.

Preheat oven to 400°F

Brush surface of crust with about a teaspoon of olive oil.  Sprinkle the mozzarella cheese evenly over the top, leaving a small border of crust.  Sprinkle 1 tablespoon of the chives over the cheese.  Bake until cheese is bubbly and crust is golden (about 10 minutes).  Remove pizza but leave oven on.

Remove beans from heat and mash slightly with a fork.  Spoon beans evenly over hot pizza.  Sprinkle with the cooked bacon and the remaining chives.  Sprinkle the Parmesan cheese over everything.  Place pizza back in the oven for 3 to 5 minutes.  Serve hot.

Serves 2 for lunch, 4 as an appetizer

One Response to “Literally Figuratively”

  1. Marie

    Unequivocally, the absolute best blog post this week.